It's Too Big to Eat! You Want Them When They're Smaller!

I have this one memory of the New Orleans Zoo that happened when I was about 13 or 14 (I guess). We were looking around at the alligator section. There was a foreign family there, too, and my dad started walking over to them leaving us to thinking stuff like oh my gosh what is he gonna do now. Anyway, my dad started talking to them about alligators and stuff. He said (and I quote), "You see that gator over there, right? That one's too big. You wanna get that smaller one. You see right there? Now, those are the perfect eatin' size! And, guess what? It'll taste like chicken! Can you believe that? Chicken! It's probably all them chickens they eat back home." And with that, the family ran off as quickly as possible and are probably scarred over this event to this day. I bet that they can't even look at alligators anymore. Poor family. I pity you for meeting my dad. He probably scared you off with his fake country accent and talk about eating gators. I apologize deeply family. Where ever you are.

- Delanna

P.S. Personally, I think they are too cute to eat. Also, my dad, who is standing over me watching me type this, says that this particular one in the picture is too big. You want something a lot smaller... And don't forget the spices when cooking it in order to add more of a chicken flavor...wait, why am I even bothering to type what he's saying?! I'm a bloody vegetarian for crying out loud! Disregard all of that because I'm too lazy to press the backspace and delete it. Forget you ever read it. In fact, I'll hit you over the head with a brick to make sure you forget it!