I Have Nothing to Blog About Anymore

This is getting ridiculous. I have nothing to blog about. Summer has barely begun. I should be out there doing stuff and trying new stuff, but instead, I'm stuck inside my house working on construction related things, playing UNO, or running the occasional errand. I highly doubt anyone wants to read about how I won 23 games of UNO out of 73 games or got my rear handed to me in Candy Land. Everyone else is doing amazing things, and all I've accomplished is...actually, I haven't accomplished anything, so never mind. Right now, I'm just going through a boring phase (I hope it's just a phase). I doubt you people want to hear about it. Speaking of which, I feel like next to no one reads this thing anymore. I only know of one person who reads it like everyday (thanks Mark). I'm guessing everyone else has lost interest, so I'm thinking about taking a break from blogging for a bit. Until I get super bored and make something to blog about. Yes, that's what I'll do. Peace, for now (even though I'll probably wind up posting out of boredom tomorrow).

- Delanna

P.S. Random fact about life in general. Apparently, soap is very useful when scrapping up floors. I didn't know that until I started randomly applying household liquids to our floor to see if anything would help. So, if you ever have to scrap up a floor for any particular reason, use soap. Do no, I repeat, ever use lemon juice. It just hardens it up until you're stuck chiseling what feels like solid stone.

You Know You Have No Life When You're Still Playing UNO

Still going strong. Kinda. Actually, we're super bored and ready to kill the bloody deck of UNO cards. Is it even possible to kill a deck of cards? I guess you could burn them individually or just shred them. Maybe it's best if you shred it first and then burn it just to make sure you get maximum torture time? Who knows. If I play one more game of UNO, I think I might actually cry. The sad thing is, I don't know why we keep going. It's some sick mural thing going on between us because we all shuffle in to our dining room and start dealing out cards. It's kinda depressing when all I have to look forward to during the summer is more UNO. Something exciting better happen and soon.

- Delanna

And We're Still at It

Whelp, Kylle, Delaney, and I are still going strong. We lost count of how many games we've played some time last night. This is getting pretty ridiculous. At least today, we're mixing in a couple of games of chess (not like it's a lot more entertaining since neither of them are anywhere near my skill level...bwahahahahahaha...), but still, this is ridiculous. What's the world record for most consecutive games of UNO ever played? Because I think we broke it. Twelve hours ago. I think we need to get out of the house and do something else. Fast. Or we might break our own record. Again.

- Delanna

57 Games of UNO Later...

Summer is boring. At least, I think so. I really don't do anything during summer. At all. Just chores, errands, and the usual taking up space/polluting air thing. In a lame attempt to overcome the boredom, my siblings and I decided to play UNO. 57 games to be exact (and we're still going strong). But, alas, UNO by itself is boring. In order to spice it up, we decided to start gambling. Unfortunately, we're all pretty much broke, so we started off gambling napkins, but we ran out when Delaney cornered the market, so we had to move on to ketchup packets (yuck). I'm not sure what we'll move onto next. Probably the straws. We are actually really lame. Who gets excited about winning 47 napkins? We do. Summer is pathetic. And so are we. Oh well. At least if i ever need a napkin, I know who to talk to. The person would wound up winning every single one, Delaney...

- Delanna

P.S. For the record, I didn't lose every single game and neither did Kylle. We were both dominating during the entire time. Kylle would win some, and I would win some. Poor Delaney came in last every single time. Then, Kylle and I got cocky and decided to place all of our napkins on one game, and Delaney surprised us all by winning in twenty turns. It was ridiculous. She refused to place down any of her napkins, so we broke out the ketchup.

My House Was Built Over an Ancient Indian Butial Mound. That's Why I Have Such Bad Luck.

So, today was spent gutting my kitchen, so we could get new kitchen stuff. As we took stuff out, we started finding really weird things like 50 year old love notes and bottle caps. This got me to thinking. I have serious bad luck. Like the worst luck imaginable. It's almost like I walked under every ladder that I could as a kid (which I did because when I was younger I had a lot better luck and liked to tempt things, so maybe that is one of the reasons why I have such bad luck?) and stacked up a lot of bad luck from that. But, apparently it's bad luck, to say, build a house over an ancient burial ground. And, there is one somewhere in my neighborhood, so I think it's under my house since I'm not the only one in my family with bad luck. We all have major bad luck. I have a feeling that if we dig deep enough we'll start finding human bones, and if we dig deeper than that, we'll start finding dinosaur bones and whatnot. I need to figure out how to break this curse that the Indians underneath our house placed on us. I feel like the best way to figure this out is to go to New Orleans and research some voodoo stuff. I guess. Who knows. Maybe if I move the curse will go away, but with my luck, it'll just follow me wherever I go.

- Delanna

Can You Casually Pull Six Inch Splitters Out of Your Clothes?

Is that a thing? I feel like it is since I'm just randomly pulling splitters (that vary from about six to ten inches in length) out of my clothes like its nothing. Which it is. But, then again, I feel like it's not actually a normal thing that most normal people do. I guess most normal people don't usually have to pull them out of their clothes though, but then again, most normal people don't decide to build an entire house by themselves. I guess I'm stuck picking wood splitters up until our kitchen is completely gutted. Joy.

- Delanna

The Flying Terror (A.K.A. The Bloody Roach That Decided It Was Gonna Fly)

So, tonight, my family decided to go see Alice Through the Looking Glass which was amazing (for those of you who have yet to see it, prepare yourself for the best time pun usage you will ever experience). We came home pretty late, so as we were walking to the front door, my dad saw this huge mother-of-all-bloody-roaches cockroach outside my window. My dad decided that rather than kill the thing, he was going to just shove it off and let it run wild. Well, when he tried to shove it off my window, the stupid thing decided that it could fly. And, you know what happened? It flew right into my bloody face. Of all the people it could fly into, it decided to fly into mine. Wonderful. I had to preform some strange panicked dance ritual before the thing flew off. Never to be seen again. Mostly because it got snatched up by a bat. I mean, what are the odds of that happening? Not that I really feel sorry for it. It did fly in my facing causing me to freak out and look pretty stupid doing so, so you know what? It totally deserved what it got. Karma can be a bleeding jerk when it wants to be.

- Delanna

Do You Want Cheese?

Absolutely not. If I ask for no cheese, just the meat and the bread, when ordering a hamburger (not for me but for my meat loving younger brother), that usually means I don't want cheese, right? Yeah, that's exactly right. Literally, ordering stuff from Sonic for my picky little brother is the hardest thing ever. He likes his burgers plain. Nothing on them. Just the meat and the bread. And, they naturally don't have something like that on any fast food menu. Joy. So, I had to ask for a number one (I think) plain. Nothing on it. Just the meat and the bread. When the guy taking my order was reading my order back at me to make sure it was right, he said (and I quote), "One number one. Plain. No cheese. Just the bread, meat, and cheese." It's like what? I had to tell him no cheese just to make sure he had heard me right, and he was like so you do want cheese then. Nooooo. I still want no cheese. What part of no cheese do you not understand? In the end, the burger had cheese, and Kylle spent the rest of the meal ticked off at the fast food workers who darned to put cheese on his bloody food.

- Delanna

P.S. Funny thing about this whole thing. If it was a veggie burger, I would've been like being on the cheese! I love cheese (hence why I'm NOT vegan, people who keep thinking I'm vegan). Kylle, for some reason, does not. I've never once seen him eat cheese during his lifetime, so I have no idea what he has against cheese. As you can tell, Kylle and I are quite different.

P.P.S. And, no, I'm not spelling Kylle's name wrong. It is spelled with two l's. Deal with it. My mom's a tad touched when it comes to names. We all have strange names. It's a fact of life.

Revenge of the Ducks

I feel like all those childhood ducks I had at one point are plotting revenge. Maybe not. Who knows? But, I know one thing for sure. I'm never ever going canoeing. Or kayaking. Ever. Just in case they decide to take revenge on me for putting them in a box. Better safe than sorry...

- Delanna

If UNO Was an Anime...

A while ago, someone sent this to me, and it's so true. I think about every game of UNO I've ever played, and I swear we were thinking the same things. We may have even been a bit more evil in our thoughts, but then again, it's every man for himself in UNO, right? You either destroy or be destroyed. It's a pretty simple concept. Anyway, I thought I would post the video here for your enjoyment. 

- Delanna

I Didn't Know My Grandparents Had a Summer Home at the Zoo!

I told you about my trip to the zoo on Monday, right? Well, I forget exactly what type of monkey it was that we were looking at, but Mark and I walked up to a cage with two monkeys in it. As soon as we got close to it, the two monkeys started noisily arguing with each other. I remember thinking wow, they sound just like my grandparents. Which is 100% true. No lie. My grandparents argue loudly all the time whether it's at their home or in public when we're eating out with them. When I heard the monkeys arguing, I was like oh god, it has to be them. There is no way it's not. My grandparents were turned into monkeys by deranged wizards for angering said deranged wizards through intense insults. How does one transform grandparents that were turned into monkeys back into their true form? I have no idea. I seriously hope that wasn't them. I haven't talked to them since graduation. Maybe I should give them a call just to make sure...? It'll be hard to explain to my mom that my grandparents have relocated to the zoo since they are now monkeys, but I doubt she'll be too disappointed because she would get to go to the zoo to visit them and there would be a cage separating them. Thinking about now, I think she would probably find this to be a good thing since they are a bit controlling...

- Delanna

P.S. You probably think I'm a horrible person and everything for making this easy mistake, but you don't know my grandparents. If you did, you would totally understand why I made this mistake.

P.P.S. I checked, and my grandparents are not actually monkeys. Apparently, they are still 100% human, and they are ticked off at me for not visiting or calling sooner. :(

P.P.P.S. Apparently, they did not get or appreciate my zoo and monkey reference that I threw into our conversation. They have no sense of humor. It's no wonder that we clash a lot. I am very sarcastic and witty when I wanna be.

P.P.P.P.S. Does anyone have a wizard on speed dial that would be willing to turn my grandparents into monkeys? I'm getting the whole you're-gonna-die-in-college-of-at-least-one-hundred-different-things speech again. Please. Some one put me out of my misery. Actually, don't bother. It'll end on its own soon enough, but I could still use that wizard...

Stupid Draft Option!!!

So apparently, I've been forgetting to actually post the stuff I write. I've been leaving it as a draft without even realizing it. Well, until today, where I realized a had a backup of drafts. Joy. This phone makes posting stuff a thousand times harder since I can't see the whole screen. See, the thing is I like to work on my posts over a certain period of time during the day. I save what I do, and I come back to it later and repeat the process until it's done. When I had my laptop, I could easily tell what was still in draft form and simply fix it by selecting it and clicking publish. Now, I can't do that. It's hard to break old habits, so I apologize in advance! If you notice I haven't posted in a while, it's probably because I forgot to actually publish my stuff, so you should totally tell me about it. :)

- Delanna

Is It Legal to Steal Baby Emus From the Zoo?

I went to the Baton Rouge Zoo with Mark, today. You could totally tell it was spring because there were baby everythings! They were all so cute! There were baby monkeys, a baby armadillo (which really wasn't part of the zoo, but it was tiny and wild making it a thousand time cuter than anything else), a baby zebra, baby goats, and many more. The cutest of all the babies, though, would have to be the baby emus. There were three of them, and they were like the cutest things ever. I almost died. The way they walked was to die for. I must have taken like fifty pictures. I really wanted to take them with me (along with the armadillo and the chipmunk), but I feel like that's illegal. And, I would probably get arrested or something. If I got caught.

- Delanna

P.S. A baby emus is actually called a chick, but I just felt like calling it a baby.

P.P.S. Emus are large flightless birds that can run up to 31 mph. They are also the second largest bird by height and are related to ostriches!

Can Extended Family Be Any More Embarrassing?!

So, graduation, people. I finally did it. I know. It was a big surprise. I don't think anyone thought I would actually make it this far. I know I didn't, but I did it. It's all over. Kinda. I'm actually more surprised that I survive the whole graduation thing because my extended family is literally the worst sometimes. People I didn't know were coming randomly decided to show up, so all the annoying, most embarrassing members of my family showed up. It was horrifying. Right after the ceremony and the tossing of the caps, my mom dragged me off to take pictures with each and everyone of them.  While we were doing this, some of my uncles decided to take selfies with some of my friends without them noticing, and then, they proceeded to send said selfies to me. Because my mom's side and my dad's side had to be separated (mostly because they don't get along, and none of my immediate family members want to listen to them complain about each other for the next six months), I had to go to my other family members to take pictures with them, too, and listen to my grandmother while she complained about me graduating like I was some huge inconvenience. Sorry, but graduation is usually a fact of life for those who don't fail or drop out of high school. After the seeming never ending pictures, my aunt decided to take us all out to eat. I literally wanted to die, and there wasn't enough room under the restaurant table for me to hide. I barely survived the embarrassing childhood stories, pictures, and complaining they put me through. At least, it's all over now, and they're all gone. Whew. I hope I never graduate again, but then again, I kinda need a college degree...

- Delanna

I Would Like to Survive 'Til My Own Graduation, Thank You Very Much!

I went to CHS's graduation today. After the whole thing was over, I went outside to see the throwing of the caps, and then, I planned on finding some of my friends who attended the school and stuff. While waiting for them to toss the caps (which took a good 20 minutes), I learned about a tradition that CHS has apparently. I was watching the guys walk outside when I saw a group of three guys start  lighting cigars. Legit cigars. It's like okay, maybe they're just delinquents, but then I saw several other guys doing it, too. Soon, about half of the guys out there were smoking, and my mind was blown. Literally blown. It was weird. I realize that they attend a Catholic school that happens to be a lot stricter than the one I attend, but this is ridiculous. One guy that I know seemed to be enjoying it a bit too much even though my friend kept threatening to smack him upside the head if he kept it up. Not only was it  weird to see guys that I know smoking cigars, but the smoke itself was unbarable. It was like being trapped in a burning building without the actual fire. I was dragging my brother behind me while I was trying to find  people, and he complained the whole time about how it was taking years off his life. It's like suck it up, boy. Yeah, the smoke was probably gonna kill us. And, yeah, I kinda wanted to live to at least graduate from high school myself. But, there are more important things like finding people and trying not to get crushed to death by people taking pictures while pushing other people out of the way. It was so weird. I hope my own graduation isn't like this.

- Delanna

My First And Probably Last Video Game Experience

Yes, I had my first video game experience today. And, no, that's not weird at all. I was just never really allowed to have them as a child, and I definitely didn't have the means of playing them since I never had access to a television under thirty years old. I have to say I don't regret not being able to play them before now because they literally make no sense. At all. I was playing something called Smash Bros 4 or something like that against Josh, who was supposedly the easiest person to beat there. I didnt understand what I was doing even though Mark explained how each of the buttom thingies worked. I will never understand why you need multiple options to jump. It doesn't make sense. Anyway, I tried my best. I think I put up a pretty good fight even though I think I killed myself a couple of times by falling off the platform, but in the end, I lost. And, I'm still not sure how. All I know is that I lost epically. Which is the best way to lose. If you must lose. I don't think I will be playing another video game any time soon, not only because I don't have the means to, but also because I SIMPLY DON'T GET THE POINT!!!

- Delanna

Kitty in the Box

Forget a Jack in the box. I always found them to be creepy probably because the one I had as a child had a legit clown straight from a horror movie in it. I wish a had a Kitty in the box. It would have been less scarring on a small child.

- Delanna

Where's My Bloody Plaque?

Today was Honors Convocation. It's supposed to be some huge ceremony congratulating people who get honors or do other things like service or are super popular with the class. To me, it's just a huge torture session. They require us to wear floor length dresses which is like a huge tripping hazard and an accident waiting to happen for a klutz like me. In fact, I nearly killed myself with that dress at least five times. Anyway, I find that it's a reminder of my failures, so sitting there for two hours was not fun. On top of that, I pity the people who didn't get anything because they were required to sit there for two hours and got nothing from it. Instead, they had to listen to the same people get called up over and over again. Not fun in my opinion. The thing that got to me the most was that I didn't get a bloody plaque. Yeah, I know you're probably thinking who cares or something like that, but I did over 200 hours of service during my four years of high school for a promised plaque. And did I get said plaque? No. Instead, I received a metal thing on a string which was a huge disappointment. If I had known that, I probably wouldn't have done the hours. Nah, I would have still done them because my mom totally would've made me, but still, I want my plaque. I was promised a plaque.

- Delanna

When Mother Nature Hates You

So, I'm writing this while crouched in my hall way because my phone just informed me that there is a tornado in my area. Joy. I just love it when Mother Nature is out to get me. It's like an almost three hour rehearsal for walking isn't enough torture for one day. No. One must also crouch in a hallway for an hour, too. Curses. I feel for my Guinea pigs though. They are terrified. But, then they aren't. It's strange to watch. One minute they are frantically running around their cage. And, the next minute, they are lounged out like they don't have a care in the world. I don't understand them sometimes.

- Delanna

Every Day I'm Dumblin'!

If you haven't seen this yet, there's something seriously wrong we you. It makes me happy every time I see it, so I decided to post it.

- Delanna

My Inability to Use a Laptop Is Killing Me

Do you know how impossible it is to find a sketchy website that has the latest episode of The Flash on it and will actually function on a phone?! It's actually impossible. I couldn't find one for the longest time, so I eventually had to breakdown and download the CW app. There was no way I was going to miss the latest episode. Especially not when the newest episode had A certain character who is supposed to be dead in it. No bloody way. Curse the fact that I no longer own a laptop...

- Delanna

Random Funny Quotes I Feel Like Posting Because I Literally Nothing Else to Waste My Time With

- "Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a brighter day."

- "I don't need a hairstylist. My pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning."

- "I know the voices in my head aren't real, but sometimes, their ideas are just absolutely awesome!"

- "When a door closes, another door should open, but if it doesn't, then go in through the window."

- "I just got off a flight that crossed through five time zones. Does that make me a time traveler?"

- "Every time you make a typo, the errorists win."

- "Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately, it kills all of its pupils."

- "To make time fly, throw your watch out the window."

- "Pac-Man teaches us a valuable lesson: eat everything you can, and if anyone tries to stop you, eat them."

- "The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously."

- "I have many hidden talents. I just wish I could find them."

- "Alchol and calculus don't mix. Don't drink and derive."

- "Living faster than the speed of regret."

- "Not sure if I'm actually learning in class, or have I just learned how to pass classes over the years?"

- "I may look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level, I'm quite busy."

- "I suffer from premature procrastination. It's when you procrastinate before even receiving a task."

- "Yawnjng is the body's way of saying 20% battery power remaining."

- "I like to say 'morning' rather than 'good morning' because if it were a 'good morning', I would be in bed rather than talking with you."

- "Authorities believe she is a member of the notorious al-Gebra movement. She is being charged with carrying weapons of math instruction."

- "Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems. I'm tired of solving them for you."

- "I don't have the time or the crayons to explain myself to you."

- "The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep!"

- "Don't worry. If Plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet."

- "If the past comes knocking, don't answer. It has nothing new to tell you."

- "My wallet is like an onion. Opening it makes me cry."

- "Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."

- "I dream of a better tomorrow where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives."

- "I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way."

- Delanna

The Annoyance Over the Lack of Pictures

It really bothers me that I have to use a phone to do everything internet related because that means I have to blog from my phone. I like adding pictures to my posts, but using a phone to add pictures is a thousand times harder than using a laptop to add pictures.

Just adding that random picture of a cactus in the middle of my post was so time consuming that I almost just gave up in the middle of pasting it. Centering and sizing it to something that meets my standards is the haaaaaardest thing ever. So, I apologize in advance for the huge lack of colorful pictures that my blog will have until I get my hands on a laptop. I guess we are all stuck with a boring, colorless blog until I can manage to steal Kylle's laptop or get my own. 

- Delanna

P.S. Curse tiny screens everywhere. They make seeing an entire page and being able to actually read it next to impossible. 

Take a Picture. It'll Last You Longer.

I was innocently sitting at the table doing absolutely nothing except taking up space when my mom demanded that I do something useful. Like iron the clothes she didn't feel like ironing. So, while she went to the back of my house to do something, I started ironing the clothes in a dazed state. Then, my mom came back and literally dropped the clothes she had in her arms in utter shock. "Wow, Delanna! I wasn't serious! I didn't think you would actually do it! I didn't even know you knew how to iron since I never bothered to teach you! Wow! I can't believe you're actually working! I need to document this!" Gee, thanks, Mom. And after saying all that, she raced to her room, grabbed her camera, and started snapping pictures like I'd never worked a day in my life. Again, thanks a lot, Mom. While she was taking her pictures, my dad walked in and looked like he almost had a heart attack. "Make sure you get a picture from every angle! I gotta have me some proof that she actually worked for at least one day in her life!" Gosh, thanks, Dad. What do you people take me for? They make it sound like I never work. Which is a complete lie. I know I can be a bit lazy at times, but I do work. A lot. Also, it's nice to know my mom was prepared to send me out into the world without knowing something as basic as ironing. I shutter to think about what would have happened if I didn't pick up ironing from sewing camp. Or cooking (more like what like cooking since I'm horrid at it) from cooking camp. Or washing clothes from sewing camp. Why do I feel like I got the most important life lessons from camp...? I feel like there's something important out there that I need to survive, but my mom forgot to teach me...

- Delanna

P.S. Don't get the wrong idea or anything, but my mom has taught me many things. I guess she just didn't have time to teach me ironing, washing, and cooking herself since she has like two other children who are even worse than I am to deal with. Love ya, Mom! :)

I Finally Found the Bloody Goose

I finally found the bloody goose. I mean movie. It took a while, but it happened. My mom was pretty insistent that I try the libraries that weren't on yesterday's list today, so I did. I decided to try Central first since it was the closest. Relatively speaking. After surviving the drive there (without getting lost once which is like my new personal best for driving places I don't usually drive), I found the bloody movie in the teen section after checking every other movie shelf which was a lot because libraries in the middle of nowhere apparently have a lot of movies. Thank you, Central Library! I would thank you more, but you didn't have a manga section. So, I still kinda hate you, but lucky for you, I don't hate you as much as I hate the Jones Creek Library.

- Delanna

A Wild Goose Chase Around the Parish

Today, I was sent on a wild goose chase around the parish. Apparently, Delaney needed a copy of the movie, Tuck Everlasting, by the end of the weekend, so I was sent on a quest to retrieve it. First, I decided to go to the Main Library on Goodwood since it's the closest to my house. When I got there, I couldn't find it anywhere, so I checked the website which said it was there. I then decided to ask someone (I know, what's the world coming to?). The librarian I asked said it was actually in transit to another library and wasn't actually in the library, so the website LIED. She told me a list of other libraries that should have had it, so my mom decided to make me check all of them. Having no other choice, I went down the list of libraries and went to each one. NONE OF THEM HAD IT. The librarian had lied. The last library on the list was the Jones Creek Library which I haven't been to in years. After getting lost like three times, I finally managed to find it. I went in to look for it, but I couldn't find it. Again. So, I decided to ask someone. Again. The person I asked informed me that the last copy had been checked out not long before I came. The entire trip was a complete waste. I swear someone had it out for me and decided to check out EVERY BLOODY COPY of that stupid, stupid movie just to mess with me by staying one step ahead of me. After learning that I had literally wasted five hours of my life checking out multiple libraries, I refused to go home empty handed, so I went to the teen section to see if they had any volumes of manga that I was looking for. Expect, they literally had like one shelf with next to nothing on it. Literally, I hate the Jones Creek Library the most out of all the libraries in the parish. It is quite literally a waste of space. Curse you, bloody libraries.

- Delanna

What a Bloody Life You Have There, Del

My mom told me to evaluate my life to figure out why I'm so bloody twisted (she thinks I'm twisted because I'm not as social as I could be with certain people, but she's not one to talk consistering the fact that she is less social than I am). I sat at our table for about ten minutes thinking about reasons that made me who I am today, but then I started getting side tracked. I noticed how I kept using the word "bloody" to describe things, and it's like why?! I'm even not British (even though that would be like the coolest thing ever)! I know I got from my mom since she used it a lot when I was younger, but she hasn't used it in years. I think she stopped when I was like three, so I should have stopped, too, right? No. I still say it for some random reason, and I don't know why. People ask me about it a lot, now that I think about it. I guess it's pretty noticeable by now. You guys have noticed it, too, right? Should I bloody stop saying bloody? But, then again, it is kinda my thing (do I even have a thing?), so maybe I shouldn't? I dunno. I don't think I could stop saying it if I even tried. It's like the word "like". It just rolls of the tongue when you least expect it.

- Delanna

A Moment of Insanity

Well, the title is a big lie. A moment of insanity? More like a life time of insanity. I'm pretty sure I've been insane for my entire life and will continue to be insane until the moment of my death. Heh heh. I mean, don't get me wrong. A lot of the choices I make in life are carefully calculated and weigh the pros and cons based on the results that my decisions may or may not lead to. These are usually the bigger decisions I'm forced to make that affect me or someone else in not so little way. But the little things in life? Ha. I tend to make those choices on a whim. And, then I immediately regret whatever stupid thing I chose to do. I especially hate those. I'm not sure what I'm thinking (and usually I'm not thinking at this point) when I do stupid things that result from those choices. Like, for example, I randomly thought it was a good idea to hang upside down from a tree in my backyard just because it was pretty nice today. Bad idea. Not only did I get brush burns on the back of my knees from falling off after being scared by Delaney (not to mention a huge head ache), but I also had like five different types of spiders crawling over me from the tiny little jumping spider to the huge mother-of-all-freaking-spiders spider (and I'm terrified of spiders). Or, another example from today would totally be when I tried to jump down the last two steps on the staircase. I'M A FREAKING KLUTZ. I should've seen the fact that I would definitely NOT make it and wind up tripping. And almost putting my head through the newly painted Sheetrock that my mom had just finished. I totally should have seen that coming. These are literally a few of my many, many, many stupid, whimsical choices that I have made in my relatively short life. I should probably be put in a mental institution since I'm pretty much a danger to myself and others. Maybe it's better if I don't make any decisions for myself least I try to lick the USS Kidd again... Well, I take that back. Life's more fun when you do things on a whim. The little surprises you get do have a tendency to spice life up a bit whether they are good or bad. So, I guess I'll continue making my stupid choices on a whim. At least I won't be bored anymore this summer.

- Delanna

P.S. That story about licking the Kidd, my dear friends, is a very long, long story privy only to a few of my close friends. And, no, I most certainly did not do this recently. I'm not that stupid. I mean, come on! What do you take me for? A fool? A dumb blonde? Don't answer that. I really don't wanna know.

Posting From a Bloody Phone

You never appreciate what you've got until it's gone. I didn't shed a single tear during the Senior Farewell. Or the Senior Mass. Or anything like that. But, when I had to turn in my laptop today to the school in order to graduate, I was bawling on the inside. Now that I have no laptop, I have to do everything on my phone. Which is like the hardest thing ever. My mom managed to single-handedly use up our data for the month, so I have to make sure I'm actually hooked up to my house's wifi in order to do anything. Also, typing on a phone is like the hardest thing ever. I'm sitting here carefully typing this, but I still manage to completely mess up a word to where I have to go back and erase an entire line. It isn't helping that my phone keeps correcting me and replacing things with some the most random words. This is literally ridiculous. I don't know what to do with myself without my laptop. I just hope I get a replacement soon.

- Delanna

I Can't Believe She Left Me Behind to Fend For Myself

The worst thing a parent can ever do is leave you behind while they decide to go to the zoo. Well, it probably wasn't all that fun since my mom did have to put up with my younger sister on a field trip but still. Was the picture she sent me of her enjoying a snowball really necessary? Seriously, I would have given anything to be walking around the Baton Rouge Zoo! Instead, I was stuck in my house with its overly creaky boards that totally sound like some creepier breaking in while "studying" for some WHAP exam tomorrow (in reality, I was trying to binge watch Fairy Tail before I have to return my laptop, but I have fallen short of finishing). But, then again, would I really want to be the one to go to the zoo with Delaney of all people? She is literally a little shock of horror. A terror. A demon. Anything and everything embodying evil. She would make grown demons run for their mothers. She scares me. Especially when she is in a bad mood, and this morning she was in the worst mood I've ever seen her in. Maybe it was because she overslept? Or maybe she went to bed too late? Whatever it was, I accidentally got in her way this morning, and the look she gave me was actually the most terrifying thing I've ever experienced. Literally. It felt almost like being turned to stone. So, ya know what? It's probably best that I didn't go. I don't think I could've handled her in that kind of mood without being killed or maimed in someway or sent to the hospital. So, thank you so much Mom for handling that kind of torture. You have no idea how thankful I am for you. Especially since you seem to control the little demon a lot better than me.

- Delanna

P.S. If you didn't get, the picture is of two demons in the anime, The Devil is a Part-Timer! And, clearly, Delaney has terrified them senseless (not the almost inhuman landlady who "scares" them in the actual episode and is standing outside the shot).

That Awkward Moment When There Are Only Mutated Leaks Left

My poor guinea pigs ran out of food today. Since it's getting to be that time of year when the sun seems to hate everything, I decided to start them on a summer diet of sorts. This diet includes veggies and fruits with a lot of water that are supposed to help them cool down since they are literally walking balls of fur. It was kinda hard to decide what to get since whatever they don't eat I'll have to eat (and I've already eaten more than my fair share of nasty parsley), but I finally decided on black berries, cucumbers, and leaks. When it came time to actually find the stuff, I found the black berries and cucumbers right off the bat. The problem was the leaks. For starters, they were hard to find. Took me forever to find them. Second, they were all mutated. No veggie should be that freaking big. I mean, yes, leaks have a tendency to be on the bigger side, but this was ridiculous. The stupid leaks were so big they could have eaten me. Maybe someone who is a huge leak fan would love them, but not me. Don't get me wrong. I have nothing against leaks. They're actually pretty good, but there's only so much leaks that an average leak appreciator can handle. Also, I doubt my guinea pigs could actually go through one of those mutated leaks before it rotted.

- Delanna

Absolute Boredom

Not having school is supposed to be fun, right? Wrong. It's sooooo boring. I guess you never really appreciate what you have until it's gone, and school is gone. It's not that I really enjoy school. It's more like it keeps me busy, and now that it's gone I have like nothing to do. Which, in a way, is kinda awkward. Not sure why or how though.

- Delanna

Siri Is Literally the Cruelest Thing Ever!

Today was pretty slow. I had absolutely nothing to do and a whole lot of time to kill, so I started messing around with Siri. Delaney, who was with me, came up with the brilliant idea to ask her what 0/0 was just to see what she said. So, we did, and this was her response:

There was literally no need to rub it in, stupid Siri! It may or may not be true, but that doesn't mean you have to bring it up! And, what did Cookie Monster have to do with any of this? I never mentioned him once, and we are definitely NOT friends!!! Seriously, Siri is a waste of space. Time to shut her up for good through settings... Bwahahaha...

- Delanna

In This World...

In this world...

It's heaven when:

The French are chefs,

The British are police,

The Germans are engineers,

The Swiss are bankers,

And the Italians are lovers.

It's hell when:

The English are chefs,

The German are police,

The French are engineers,

The Swiss are lovers,

And the Italians are bankers.

- Delanna

Tsar Wars

I always wondered what was going on in Russia. Russians are the coolest, no? I swear they can turn something as boring as Star Wars (sorry Star Wars fans, but you have my brother to thank for the fact that I hate it) and turn it into the coolest thing ever. I totally need to visit sometime.

- Delanna

The Beets

I love puns, but I have to say, out of all the puns I've ever heard, beet puns are, by far, the best kind of pun. Clearly. Just look at this!

Was that too "punny" for you? If so, you should reevaluate your bloody life and try again. How can someone not appreciate a good beet pun?!

- Delanna

Here's What's Happening Now

I saw this today and loved it, so I thought I would share it with you people by posting it here:

Fooled you, didn't it? Aren't fake informational charts just the best?! I need to make my own fake informational chart with scary, made-up facts that will have people running for their lives when they read it. Bwahahahahaha... 

- Delanna

P.S. You probably shouldn't actually let me do this. I would most likey permanently scar young children and give old people heart attacks... 

I Can't Just Not Talk About Fairy Tail

I mentioned Fairy Tail a couple of days ago, and I realized that I can't just mention Fairy Tail without like talking about my favorite characters and stuff since it is literally one of my favorite animes. That's just not like me at all! So here we go:

Plot:

Fairy Tail is about wizards! Sounds overdone, right? Ha, it's not! This one is a bit different. It's about a group of wizards who form a guild called Fairy Tail (in this anime, a wizard must be part of a guild to be considered a full wizard). It follows their adventures and their path of destruction (they have a tendency to destroy things) as they take on jobs through their guild. 

Main Characters:

Natsu Dragneel

Nickname: Salamander

Magic: Fire Dragon Slayer Magic

Weakness: Extreme Motion Sickness

Happy

Nickname: Kittymander (self-proclaimed)

Magic: Aera Magic

Species: Exceed 

Lucy Heartfilia

Magic: Celestial Magic

Golden Gatekeys: 10/12

Weapon of Choice: Whip 

Gray Fullbuster (my personal favorite)

Magic: Ice Maker/Ice Demon Slayer Magic

Specialty: Inanimate Objects

Strange Habit: Stripping at Unusual Times

Erza Scarlet

Ncikname: Titania, Queen of the Fairies

Magic: Requip/The Knight Magic

Strength: S-Class Wizard

Gajeel Redfox

Nickname: Black Steel Gajeel

Magic: Iron Dragon Slayer Magic

Previous Guild: Phantom Lord

Panther Lily

Magic: Aera Magic 

Raised: Edolas

Species: Exceed

Juvia Lockser

Nickname: Rainwoman, Juvia of the Great Sea

Magic: Water Magic

Previous Guild: Phantom Lord (Element 4)

Wendy Marvell

Nickname: Sky Dragon, Priestess of the Sky

Magic: Sky Dragon Slayer Magic

Previous Guild: Cait Shelter

Carla

Magic: Aera Magic

Special Gift: Precognition

Species: Exceed

Master Makarov Dreyar

Magic: Giant Magic

Strength: Ten Wizard Saints

Status: Master of Fairy Tail

Favorite Guilds:

Fairy Tail

Status: Legal Guild

Location: Magnolia Town, Fiore

Masters: Mavis Vermilion, Precht Gaebolg, Makarov Dreyar, Macao Conbolt, Gildarts Clive, Makarov Dreyar, Erza Scarlet, Makarov Dreyar

S-Class Wizards: Erza Scarlet, Gildarts Clive, Laxus Dreyar, Mirajane Strauss

Blue Pegasus

Status: Legal Guild

Location: Fiore

Masters: Bob

The Trimens: Ichiya Vandaley Kotobuki, Hibiki Lates, Eve Tearm, Ren Akatsuki

Lamia Scale

Status: Legal Guild

Location: Margaret Town, Fiore

Masters: Ooba Babasaama

Active Wizards: Lyon Vastia, Sherria Blendy, Yuka Suzuki, Toby Horhorta 

Cait Shelter:

Status: Legal Guild (Disbanded)

Location: Fiore

Masters: Roubaul

Former Wizards: Wendy Marvell, Carla

Saber Tooth

Status: Legal Guild

Location: Fiore

Masters: Jiemma, Sting Eucliffe

Active Wizards: Rogue Cheney, Orga Nanagear, Rufus Lore, Minerva Orland, Yukino Agria, Dobengal, Lector

Crime Sorcière

Status: Independent Guild 

Location: Fiore (Mobile)

Masters: None

Active Wizards: Jellal Fernandes, Meredy, Richard Bucjanan, Erik, Macbeth, Sawyer, Sorano, Ultear Milkovich

Phantom Lord:

Status: Legal Guild (Disbanded)

Location: Oak Town, Fiore

Masters: Geoffrey, Jose Porla

Element 4: Aria, Juvia Lockser, Sol, Totomaru; S-Class Wizard: Gajeel Redfox

Twilight Ogre

Status: Legal Guild

Location: Magnolia Town, Fiore

Masters: Banaboster

S-Class Wizards: Unknown

Quatro Cerberus

Status: Legal Guild

Location: Fiore

Masters: Goldmine

S-Class Wizards: Bacchus Groh

Mermaid Heel

Status: Legal Guild

Location: Fiore

Masters: Unknown

Active Wizards: Kagura Mikazuchi, Araña Webb, Beth Vanderwood, Risley Law, Millianna

Raven Tail

Status: Legal Former Dark Guild (Disbanded)

Location: Fiore

Masters: Ivan Dreyar

Active Wizards: Obra, Flare Corona, Kurohebi, Nullpudding

Orochi's Fin

Status: Legal Guild

Location: Fiore

Masters: Unknown

Active Wizards: Monster Tamer

You people probably have no idea what I'm talking about or even care, but whatever. This was more for my enjoyment than yours. Sorry. No offense or anything. ;)

- Delanna

It Finally Came!!!

I recently ordered volume two of Hetalia off Amazon, and it finally decided to come in. I was so excited, but before I could even open the book to look at the first page, my mom snatched from my hands. She said she was just going to keep it for me until all my exams were finished, so I wouldn't get distracted. Well, for her information, I would only be distracted for an hour, tops, because that's how long it would take me to read that single book. This is actually pretty depressing since I've been dying to finally read past volume one.

 - Delanna

I Shall Watch Every Episode of Fairy Tail Before I Turn in My Laptop

If you didn't know, one of my favorite animes, Fairy Tail, is one of the longest animes I follow. Like, seriously, it's literally seven seasons long. A few new English dubbed episodes were released, but I haven't watched them yet because I literally couldn't remember what had happened in the last episodes. It would be weird if I decided to randomly start somewhere in the middle, so I decided to start back at the beginning. The problem is that I have to turn my laptop in to my school on May 10, and it's like my only source of internet. So, I'm basically freaking out and have decided that I will finish the entire series before that happens. It probably won't happen though because it is a long series, and I kinda have to at least attempt to prepare for all my exams.

- Delanna

Origami Anyone?

I've been pretty bored lately. So I've temporarily picked up origami! Yay! I had to make some origami objects for a mobile project that I had in physics, and ever since then (then being like a week ago), I've been kinda obsessed with origami. Weird. I've literally wasted my time making intense origami animals when I should be preparing for my AP exams. Oh well. Spending an hour or so on one origami animal is normal right?

- Delanna

P.S. If you couldn't figure it out, the orange animal is a cat, and the red animal is a dragon.

The Concert to End All Concerts

We had the Large Ensemble Concert today (which I was in unfortunately). It's the last concert of the year, and the last concert I'll probably ever be in which for some reason (and I do know why) doesn't bother me in the slightest. I spent the entire concert terrified because I had a piccolo solo during the last song. I wound up screwing up, so it really didn't matter. I was just glad when it was finally over, and I could finally relax.

- Delanna