On Saturday, the St. Patrick's Day parade unfortunately didn't fail to roll through my neighborhood. Despite the rain and the supposed "thunderstorms" that caused habitat for humanity to be cancelled (and now I still need about three more), people were out waiting for the parade. You had your weirdos dancing in the streets, the creepy vendors, and all those people you know but wish you didn't. Personally, I don't think parades should be open to civilians. They are weapons of mass destruction. Literally. They should be used to win wars, not win happiness. No one cares about happiness anymore. You could literally bring any enemy to their knees just by the sheer terror of a Louisiana parade. The drunks and other weirdos would be the first wave. The enemy would fall over in confusion after witnessing the strange dress, dancing, speech, and many, many other things that make me personally want to run away. The second wave would be the bands. They would blast the hearing out of anyone who is still somehow standing. The third and final wave would be the floats. The beads they throw (like the really, really thick ones that could take someones head off) would kill the enemies or at least knock them out for the count. The candies would poison them to death. And if that had the audacity to still try to fight, the floats themselves would easily crush any hope of rebellion. Quite literally.
- Delanna
No comments:
Post a Comment