Literally, my Theology teacher, Sister Joan, destroys birthdays. She makes the poor, unfortunate soul who is unlucky enough to have a birthday sit in front of the class with her back to the board. Then, she proceeds to force the rest of the class to go up and write nice things about that person, but you aren't really allowed to write fluffy, meaningless words like kind or smart or caring. Well, people do it anyway because most people don't know everyone in their class PERSONALLY. That would be kinda creepy. I know I have trouble coming up with stuff for people that I don't know. As if that isn't bad enough, the birthday girl then has to read what everyone wrote (awkward...) and sit still for a picture that will be posted on the board for all eternity (or at least until the end of the year). Once that's all done, the class has to sing a lovely round of "Happy Birthday" like they are attending a funeral (that is being held on the dead person's birthday). People who managed to get out of her class without ever having to go through all that are literally the luckiest people alive. I just hope I'll be able to make it out alive. Or better yet, I hope she never realizes I have a birthday. Like every other human being. I feel like that could actually happen if I play my cards right. She isn't very observant or all there, so maybe I will survive my birthday?
- Delanna
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